Lotta stuff

I don't know if its practical to write about all the stuff that's going on right now, but some things I've gotta get down. Foremost is what's on my mind right now: expectations for the girls. Gloria asked to go to a friend's house and Carolina said she wasn't ready. This prompted me to ask about what the expectations were for her to go. I was told that she needed to make sure her room was clean, and that the house was clean, and that she had practiced music and done her homework. I inquired about what cleaning the house entailed, and I was told that she needed to make some contribution to the house in general--just taking care of her own things wasn't enough. I then inquired into whether these expectations held true for Isabel. I was told that Isabel was responsible for making sure that the upstairs bathroom was neat. Then I was told that Isabel has been allowed to roam free regardless.

This last part is due mostly to me. I have been largely unaware of these expectations on the girls, and so when they asked me about permission to do a thing, I usually saw no reason to say no. Sometimes I said, "Ask your mother" , or "if its okay with your mother" because I was vaguely aware that she might have had some stipulations, but I had none.

So there's obviously been some disconnect. How come I didn't know about these expectations? Because I haven't been involved. There was a time however, where we came up with some mutual expectations. What happened to those? I guess they kind of disintegrated. Or morphed. Or something. At any rate, it is clear that my level of involvement has been somewhat lacking, and I intend to change that.

This exchange took place while I was working on the next budget. It always takes time to figure out where all our money is going and what changes have been made but not recorded. I'm now trying to figure out where the budget is lacking. Because it shows that we should have surplus money, but there has been none. So somewhere we're spending more than we should. But where? That's not easy to figure out.